Today’s post in this Challenge asks for 8 fears. Well that shouldn’t be too hard for this scaredy cat. I constantly worry, it’s really bad. I come from a long line of worriers and I am no different.
1. Tornados. When I was 5 a tornado struck down in the parking lot of the public pool and I was there with my mom. The bathroom was full and when the storm first hit I was stuck in an area with my mom hovered over me where there was no ceiling and only planked beams above us. We eventually were able to get to the bathroom but the fear was already rooted. I in particularly get anxious if it’s storming while I’m traveling and away from any place with a basement.
2. Not being able to have babies. I think this is a common fear among most women and I am terrified that I won’t be able to have babies some day. All I’ve ever wanted was to be a Mom. If this is the case then I would be completely open to adopting, my own little sister was adopted. Gods will be done.
3. Being kidnapped. Yes I am in my mid twenties and still have a fear of being kidnapped. When I was little if unsolved mysteries was on TV I had to leave the room, even the host’s voice would freak me out. When I’m home alone I’m convinced every bad guy will know and find me.
4. Having someone I love have an untimely death, a family member, or B, a good friend. This terrifies me and even thinking about it causes extreme anxiety.
5. Having a terminal illness. I’ve had many skin cancer scares and have convinced myself many times I’m dying. My poor Dad is a physician and he quite often receives phone calls from me stating my newest misdiagnosis. Two weeks ago I thought my bumped shin was bone cancer. Thankfully I’m relatively healthy and to this day cavity free.
6. Being unattractive. There I said it. This is superficial but it’s also me being honest. I have a fear of becoming unattractive and pride myself in being a pretty girl. So let the pretty live.
7. Getting to Heaven and learning my life wasn’t the plan God wanted me to follow. I always pray for God’s will to be what I want but I’m very terrified that I’m either self serving or not using my talents the way God wants.
8. Disappointing or hurting the ones I love. I’ll scoop into this category judgment. It’s something we’re all faced. We can’t please everyone and be true to ourselves but it’s nice to know that others are happy with us. It’s even nicer to know we’re doing the right thing for ourselves.
I’ll end with my very favorite quote that mentions fear:
“Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.”- Erica Jong